trouvé un autre amour
by pretty sure of it
Summary: ENGLISH STORY, FRENCH TITLE. My heart, there wasn’t just a hole in it; it was more like it was gone completely. And then he came, like the doctor he was. He patched me up and mended me. A romance that should never had existed.
1. Chapter 1

**NEW STORY :DDD**

**trouvé un autre amour**

* * *

_B/POV_

_2 MONTHS (after Edward left.)_

Since E-Ed, he had left me I no longer lived my life, I guess you could say I walked around like a zombie. And im a world full of vampires, zombies probably weren't too far off. My heart, there wasn't just a hole in it; it was more like it was gone completely.

'Bella' called Charlie as I sat in my room. I walked down the stairs after him. The only thing I lived for was my dad these days.

'Yes dad' I grumbled as I sat down on the chair. Due to my clumsiness I didn't quite make it onto the chair and feel onto the floor.

'What the hell is up with grades' he almost shouted looking at me.

'I know you can do better than this and so help me Bella, Florida is looking mighty fine right now' he let out a long breath waiting for me to answer.

'I-I-I'm sorry-y' I stuttered.

'Bella sorry isn't going to cut it this time' he said slowly 'im taking you to the doctors.'

'Im fine dad really' I said standing up, my legs collapsed underneath me.

'You're not fine Bella. You don't eat, you can barely walk, your grades are on a D average, and we're out of Advil and I got a new packet last week.' I felt bad I did honestly but I just. It was like I couldn't control it. Besides Charlie really there was nothing else living for. And with him, meaning the Cullen, taking my heart when he left I guess nothing could really make me happy.

'Dr. Gerandy' said he could fit you in at lunch so I need you to go get dressed Bella.' I nodded and carefully walked myself upstairs. I changed into whatever I could find first and then I walked slowly back down stairs. Charlie was waiting for me at his car.

'Let's go Bells' he said, sympathy was back in his voice I climbed slowly into the car.

_4 MONTHS (after Edward left.)_

Dr. Gerandy has prescribed me with an anti-depressant that I need to talk three times a day. A sleeping pill which would help me at night and then a medicine that would help regain strength. Two weeks after he prescribed these he left for Dallas, he got a better offer than little old Forks and had decided to leave willingly. What hadn't been anticipated was that fact that I was now addicted to the medication. Without it felt helpless, like there was no need to live. But of course there wasn't I was only here because of Charlie. With it I still felt helpless but I could move out of my bed. Charlie had taken me out of school and Angela came ever Tuesday and Thursday afternoon. Those afternoons I made sure I had at least three of the anti-depressants so it would be nicer for her to be around.

_AN/POV_

_AN=Angela, A=Alice_

They had asked me to come and tutor Bella every Tuesday and Thursday afternoons. As much as I loved my old friend Bella I did dread these afternoons. Just seeing her like that made my skin crawl. It was right. She was skinny and even more pale that usual, some days as pale as the Cullen's. And we all knew she was addicted to medications she was taking. Her gorgeous brown eyes were now this horrible almost black but kind of brown colour. But I had to come because I needed to be there for my friend. I even got a laugh out of her once which Charlie was very thankful for. I guess it really was getting too much for everyone when I walked in one afternoon and saw Bella lying on the floor.

'Bella' I almost screamed running in to her.

'Angela' she called back feebly.

'What the hell happened?' I asked her as I grabbed out my cell.

'I tried to get down my pills when I slipped' she replied as I looked around I realized she was talking about the pill for her period.

'Why do you need that?' I asked but she looked at me.

'I can't do it anymore Ang' she whispered looking at me.

'Do it for Charlie' I replied as I dialed his number.

'What happened this time?' he said on the first ring.

'I walked in and she was lying on the floor, Charlie why do they have her on the pill?' I asked.

'Its easier for her if her umm, well you know is regulated' I could imagine Charlie blushing as he said that.

'Right' I replied 'listen I walked in and found Bella laying on the floor and oh my god' I said looking up.

'What up Angela?' he asked.

'Charlie she's got cuts on her wrist–' he hung up and I knew he was coming.

'Why the hell did you tell Charlie that?' she screamed at me. She tried to stand up but dropped to the floor again.

'Bella we need to get you fixed this isn't right' I said and she just looked at me. Anger coated her eyes and I cringed away.

'How could you, you were supposed to be my friend' and then she started crying. I sat down next to her and pulled her up in my arms. Within seconds my white top was streaked with stains from her tears.

'He left me. One minute he was saying he loved me and then the next he told me he didn't want me anymore' and then I got it. She was still confused about why he didn't want her, yes it hurt her that he had left, immensely so. But she wanted to know why he left. She knew it wasn't because he didn't love her, of course. She wasn't sure what was wrong with her, and the only way she could ever get over this was if he came back. Or she found someone else to love.

_B/POV_

They took me to the hospital. They left me in there for two weeks. Charlie was happy that I had cried, maybe not for the fact that it was four hours worth of crying, but he said it was good that I could finally get it all out and that I had been holding it in too long. I knew better.

The newest medication they gave me didn't do anything. That numbness I felt was gone, instead it caused a different reaction. Like fire inside of me. I snapped at Charlie and Angela. They took it so well it almost made me feel guilty but I guess the medication wouldn't allow that. He eventually gave me back my old meds and I felt at ease again. Well until I heard that Carlisle was going to be my doctor.

* * *

trouvé un autre amour

**so i wasnt going to leave you with an epic cliffy on the first chapter, so i decided a tiny little on. bu-ut next chapter will be a Carlisle Point Of View**

**: )**


	2. AN, SORRY ABOUT THIS

Alright guys so here is the deal,

I have the stories;

●1800's

●I stole your dream, again

●The Faerie from the bottom of the garden

And

●Trouvé un autre amour

So its your turn to tell me, WHICH ONE SHOULD BE MY MAIN FOCUS ? WHICH ONE DO YOU WANT ME TO FIND A BETA FOR AND CONTINUE ?

**VOTE NOW **_**ON MY PROFILE**_** FOR YOUR SAY INTO WHICH STORY I AM TO CONTINUE**.

THANKS FOR YOU SUPPORT,

ASHLEIGH XX.


	3. PREVIEWS FOR ALL THE STORIES

**PREVIEWS**

**these are previws for the four stories. they will be at the start of the next chapters, so which ever story is chosen will of course start with the beggining below. use these to influence your voting.**

**THANKS SO MUCH FOR THIS GUYS, XO.**

_The Faerie from the bottom of the Garden_;

'_I'm here for prom' she said smiling widely 'I'm your date remember?'_

'_Edward?' I asked looking at him, I vulnerable as he looked down at me._

'_Bella I _am so sorry it completely slipped my mind. '

'Well isn't that lovely of you' I said sharply and he frowned.

'Tanya I'll meet you at the car' he said sharply and she smiled in success as she walked outside.

'I'm so sorry about this Bella, but I have to do the right thing and because I said yes to her first…' he trailed off and smiled at me in a hope that I would forgive him.

'Oh no problem Edward' I replied trying to stay calm, he could see otherwise.

'Bella please you know I would've don't anything to have gone with you' he said reaching out to cup my cheek.

'It's okay' I replied smiling at him 'you go have fun and I'll see you again tomorrow.'

'Are you sure because I could fake an illness or something or other' he said smiling widely. I giggled at his excuse for a joke.

'I hardly believe she is going to take that excuse lightly.' He chuckled and then frowned.

'She's screaming at me to go outside' he winced and I laughed.

'Lucky I'm not a mind reader' I teased flicking him on his nose and walking upstairs.

'Goodbye Bella' he called, he sound upset and I sighed.

'By Edward' I said right as the door closed. I walked up to Alice's room and sat down in the chair I was in before. But unfortunately this time I wasn't tired, so I just sat there waiting for something to happen.

'_Bella, dove sei?'_ called out a voice I recognized instantly.

'In Alice's room Esme' I called back and she sighed.

'Perché non sei in ballo?' she asked in a worrying tone.

'Tanya.' Esme chuckled at my remarkable one word answer.

'I miss Italy' I said abruptly and she laughed.

'Well I have a plan' she said 'but unfortunately it doesn't involve you flying to Italy anytime soon.'

'Oh' I replied but nodded for her to continue.

'Edward's seen you in what you wearing,' she confirmed 'so we need you in something even more striking and alluring.'

'Oh Esme you're a genius' I squealed hugging her tightly.

'And Alice has the perfect dress…'

_I stole you dream, again;_

'_It's okay; you just need a clean slate.'_

'_A clean slate' I whispered looking at her._

'_Wait, no' she said again 'you need Edward…'_

I woke in Alice's room.

'Hey Bella' she whispered looking at me.

'My head hurts, I need a-'

She had cut me off 'no Bella, clean slate remember.'

'Oh' I said turning red, well not to red because I felt like shit.

'You're meeting Edward in an hour and it's a half an hour drive, well I told him there's a fifty percent chance you will not be meeting him there. Can I dress you?'

'Umm' I said looking at her 'simple and low key.'

'Sure' she said smiling and walking to her wardrobe.

I sat in the car, debating whether to go or not. Alice had left my hair down and only applied the tiniest bit of makeup leaving me in my natural and vulnerable state. I was wearing a pair if comfortable blue jeans that were old and faded. I had on black ballet flats and an oversize black jumper. It was comfortable but somehow looked good as well. I drove at a reasonable pace but ended up being ten minutes late. I quickly walked into the cafe side of the book shop which was practically deserted. Well apart from the coffee lady a group of around four old woman and Edward. He was black jeans a very dark gray top and black converse. He looked incredible. I stared at him for a few seconds linger until his green eyes meet mine. He smiled his breathtaking crooked smiling but it soon faded as he assessed my appearance, of course he would be able to tell if I felt like shit, let alone look like it. I walked up to the table.

'You look terrible' he said as I sat down carefully.

'I promised alike a clean slate' I said shakily and he sighed.

'You're still gorgeous Bella, remember that' he said, his eyes mesmerizing.

'Coffee or tea?' asked a waiter walking up to us.

'I'll have a long black' said Edward.

'And a green tea' I said and he raised an eyebrow at me.

'Caffeine's addictive and with the state my livers in probably the worst thing.'

'Bella are okay, honestly?'

'No Edward I'm not' I said with a sigh, I realized that I sat rigidly.

'It's my fault isn't it?' he asked quietly…

_1800's_

'_Would this have anything to do with the Eiffel tower?' he asked starting our conversation._

_We fell asleep in each other's arms a few hours later, and I was sure I was marrying the right man._

I woke up the next morning and I could barely move. Jacob had his arm flung over me in such a fashion it was pinning me down.

'Jacob' I said and but he just snored and rolled even more on top of me.

'Get up' I said again hitting him on the head.

'Ow' he murmured looking at me, fortunately he was smiling.

'Morning sleepy' I murmured kissing him lightly on his cheek. He smiled and I blushed lightly.

'So what are we doing today?' he asked me as he yawned.

'Well I need a dress for the wedding, and invites need to be planned' I started 'then we need to go pick up my dad from the docks.'

'You father can read minds can't he?' asked Jacob and I giggled.

'He'll love you' I said and Jacob laughed.

'Daddy' I called as I ran up too him, he smiled widely and hugged me tightly as I ran into his arms.

'Hey sweetheart' he replied 'I can't believe your getting married.'

'Don't be daft' I replied 'it was bound to happen eventually.'

'But to a werewolf' he replied with a raised eyebrow.

'He was the one that imprinted on me' I replied pointing to Jacob who effectively smiled sheepishly.

'That's who you're marrying?' he asked with an incredulous expression.

'Um… yeah' I replied trying to see what was wrong with this.

'I don't think I'm okay with this' he replied.

'And who do you suppose I marry then?' I asked dad, stepping back from him.

'Nahuel' he said firmly. And with that one name everything came back to me.

'No dad' I whispered.

'Why not Ness?' he asked softening up slightly 'you had it all, what went wrong.'

_I don't want to talk about it_ I said to him.

'Ness' he murmured grabbing my hand.

_No dad_ I replied.

'Please Renesmee' he replied, everyone was looking at me intently. I took a breath as I tried to work everything out.

_Because he rapped me…_

_**trouvé un autre amour;**_

_The newest medication they gave me didn't do anything. That numbness I felt was gone, instead it caused a different reaction. Like fire inside of me. I snapped at Charlie and Angela. They took it so well it almost made me feel guilty but I guess the medication wouldn't allow that. He eventually gave me back my old meds and I felt at ease again. Well until I heard that Carlisle was going to be my doctor._

_C/POV_

_(Carlisle__=C/POV – Charlie=CH/POV)_

'Carlisle' said Edward as he walked into my office.

'What is it Edward' I asked frustration seeping into my tone. I didn't usually get this frustrated but this boy was getting on my nerves.

'You can't move back to Forks' he said.

'Why Edward' I said throwing my hands up.

'Because Esme needs you' he replied letting breath out.

'She has Alice and Rose' I said looking down. Me and Esme had decided to get a divorce. The idea was mutual.

'Why did you get a divorce?' asked Edward.

'Because who were we kidding' I said sitting down, out of pure habit.

'We weren't in love Edward' I replied 'we just wanted to be in love.'

'Oh' he replied, probably reading my thoughts to understand what I actually meant.

'Six years?' he asked in an incredulous.

'When Emmett says we've got nothing on him, he _is not_ exaggerating' I said and we both let in a little chuckle.

'Why Forks?' he asked.

'They need a doctor' I replied shrugging slightly. I was currently packing my first edition novels into a bag.

'Can you leave some on them?' he asked with a weak smile, I smiled back.

'I won't interfere with her son' I replied 'if that's your wish.'

'It's not that Carlisle' he said sadly placing his hands in his pockets.

'What is it Edward.'

'Alice has had some recent visions' he said looking up at me 'of course not happen for at leart five years. They are practically set in stone.'

'What are they?' I asked again, worried about the future's events.

'You're going to get married' he said.

'Who's the bride?' I managed to choke out as I thought about this.

'Bella…' he whispered.

As I drove to Forks I thought frequently about the girl you was supposedly my future wife. I could never imagine anyone but Esme, let alone Bella. My pager suddenly went off. There was an emergency at the hospital.

I drove as fast as I could, reaching the hospital in half the time. I grabbed a white coat and my stethoscope before appearing in the emergency ward.

'What's up?' I asked the Nurse and the ambulance came in.

'Girl, eighteen, awake, vitals seem to be good. Concussion and Minor fraction to wrist. Looks like internal bleeding.'

'Alright bring her into wing three' I instructed and everything fell into the perfect pattern. Until I saw the girl that was lying on the bed…

**AND WHILE IM AT IT, DOES ANYONE WANT TO BETA THE CHOSEN STORY, OR IF THEY STORY THEY LIKE BEST IS CHOSEN WOULD THEY LIKE TO BETA. PM ME OR REVIEW WITH ANSWER. **

**CHEERS (:**


	4. THE WINNING STORY

OKAY GUYS WE HAVE OUR WINNER, trouvé un autre amour

I understand if you were reading another story and don't want to read this one but I would appreciate it, if you give it ago.

This is a Bella x Carlisle story and involves vampires.

BUT I NEED A BETA, REVIEW OR PM ME IF YOU CAN (:

The total votes from the poll and reviews;

**Trouvé un autre amour**** = 5**

I stole your dream, again = 4

The Faerie from the bottom of the garden = 4

1800's = 3

CHAPTER ONE WILL BE HERE IN A COUPLE DAYS.


	5. Chapter 2

**NOW ALL I NEED IS A BETA (:**

_The newest medication they gave me didn't do anything. That numbness I felt was gone, instead it caused a different reaction. Like fire inside of me. I snapped at Charlie and Angela. They took it so well it almost made me feel guilty but I guess the medication wouldn't allow that. He eventually gave me back my old meds and I felt at ease again. Well until I heard that Carlisle was going to be my doctor._

_C/POV_

_(Carlisle__=C/POV – Charlie=CH/POV)_

'Carlisle' said Edward as he walked into my office.

'What is it Edward' I asked frustration seeping into my tone. I didn't usually get this frustrated but this boy was getting on my nerves.

'You can't move back to Forks' he said.

'Why Edward' I said throwing my hands up.

'Because Esme needs you' he replied letting breath out.

'She has Alice and Rose' I said looking down. Me and Esme had decided to get a divorce. The idea was mutual.

'Why did you get a divorce?' asked Edward.

'Because who were we kidding' I said sitting down, out of pure habit.

'We weren't in love Edward' I replied 'we just wanted to be in love.'

'Oh' he replied, probably reading my thoughts to understand what I actually meant.

'Six years?' he asked in an incredulous.

'When Emmett says we've got nothing on him, he _is not_ exaggerating' I said and we both let in a little chuckle.

'Why Forks?' he asked.

'They need a doctor' I replied shrugging slightly. I was currently packing my first edition novels into a bag.

'Can you leave some on them?' he asked with a weak smile, I smiled back.

'I won't interfere with her son' I replied 'if that's your wish.'

'It's not that Carlisle' he said sadly placing his hands in his pockets.

'What is it Edward.'

'Alice has had some recent visions' he said looking up at me 'of course not happen for at leart five years. They are practically set in stone.'

'What are they?' I asked again, worried about the future's events.

'You're going to get married' he said.

'Who's the bride?' I managed to choke out as I thought about this.

'Bella…' he whispered.

As I drove to Forks I thought frequently about the girl you was supposedly my future wife. I could never imagine anyone but Esme, let alone Bella. My pager suddenly went off. There was an emergency at the hospital.

I drove as fast as I could, reaching the hospital in half the time. I grabbed a white coat and my stethoscope before appearing in the emergency ward.

'What's up?' I asked the Nurse and the ambulance came in.

'Girl, eighteen, awake, vitals seem to be good. Concussion and Minor fraction to wrist. Looks like internal bleeding.'

'Alright bring her into wing three' I instructed and everything fell into the perfect pattern. Until I saw the girl that was lying on the bed…

I stared working on her quickly, she turned out to have minor internal bleeding and four broken ribs. She was in head on with a silver Volvo, the head of the surgical departments Volvo. Of all her luck.

When she finally woke up from the surgery Charlie was sitting on a hard plastic chair glaring at me. I stood up against the door frame.

'Dad what happened?' she asked looking concerned, her eyes looked around the room as she took in everything, but suddenly they flashed to me. She gasped in shocked and squeezed her eyes back. I laughed to myself as she closed her eyes and opened one up.

'Bella' said Charlie obviously trying to hold back a smile also.

'Did I hit his Volvo?' she asked her voice coming out weak and croaky.

'No Bella' I said solemnly 'I'm the only one living in Forks now.' She hesitated as she went to say something but I stopped her.

'I just need to do a quick check up and then I'll need to talk to you – Charlie – outside.' They both nodded and I walked over to her.

'Charlie what medications did they put Bella on?' I asked outside when I had finished with Bella, she was fine thankfully.

'Anti-depressants, sleeping pills and some other medicine.'

'Charlie this medicine is bad for her' I said running a hand through my hair 'it's like she's have a medicine cocktail, all of them together is worse than to many of just one of the pills.'

'But Dr. Gerandy said they would be fine' said Charlie, he looked like he wanted to kill someone.

'We need to take her off the pills' I replied 'which is most likely going to make her angry and frustrated as her body will crave them. She'll vomit and feel very sick the first couple of days'

She will need to stay at your house as this hospital doesn't have the facilities for such a treatment and I will check up on her every morning and night for the next few weeks.'

'Just don't get to friendly with her' said Charlie 'your kid Edwin put her in this right mess.'

'I know Charlie and I must apologize' I replied 'but this ordeal hasn't been good for our family either. Edward is currently in Africa in a boarding school and me and Esme are getting a divorce.' He grunted and I sighed.

'Charlie as a doctor' I said 'it is in my best interest to get Bella better and I understand that you may feel uncomfortable with the position I am putting your family in but I feel this is the best way.'

'I guess your right' he said quickly. I nodded and grabbed my Bella's chart.

'I'll need to ring Renee to get some background information from her doctors in Arizona and then I'll be back with her treatment information and the hospital can release her.'

'Thanks' he grunted walking back into Bella's room. I walked over to the reception and asked Nurse Theresa for Renee's information.

'_Hello_' said Renee.

'Hello Mrs. Dwyer, I'm Dr Carlisle Cullen and I'm calling on account of your daughter Bella.'

'_You mean Isabella_' she said harshly.

'Bella has asked me to call her that' I replied 'I'm just calling to ask for you to fax down all of Bella's medical records so she can be released tomorrow.'

'_Of course´_ she replied '_your related to that boy aren't you_?' she asked.

'I am but he is in a boarding school in Africa at the moment' I replied and she sighed with relief.

'_Look after her_' she said before hanging up harshly. Five minutes later, eight dinner requests and one emergency call the faxes were in and I looked over them. She had broken eight bones when she was little. Fractured her left wrist twice and had multiple broken ribs more than three times.

'Carlisle' said Charlie nodding at me as I walked in. Bella's eyes went wide and so did Angela's.

'Bella, Angela' I said smiling at them. Bella's mouth opened but she closed it before saying anything.

'Hello Dr. Cullen' said Angela timidly.

'Now Bella' I said looking at her charts.

'Everything seems to be in order and we're going to discharge you tomorrow morning.' She was looking at her hands in her lap but I could see her smile at this piece of news.

'Can I have the medicine back' she asked in a whisper.

'We're letting you go home on the condition that all use of your medication halts. This medication isn't doing anything for your body and I'm afraid that continued use could amount to organ failure.'

'Is he coming back' she asked quietly, keeping her eyes down.

'Bella' huffed Charlie in a warning tone.

'I'm sorry Bella; he's in a boarding school in Africa.' A small smiled played on her lips, she saw the lie in that.

'Now Bella tomorrow morning when you go home I'll be accompanying you so we can organize everything. I'll be checking up on you every morning and night for a few more weeks until everything is in the clear.'

'Okay' she whispered and I nodded.

'I'll be back with the paperwork' I said walking out leaving them to talk among themselves.

The next morning Bella was all packed and out of the hospital gown.

'Carlisle' said Charlie 'I've been called to Seattle. As much as I hate burdening you could Bella possibly stay in the hospital tonight?' he asked.

'We actually don't have the facilities tonight but I could watch her tonight until you get back?' I offered and he nodded vigorously.

'I would appreciate that Carlisle' he said but I could still tell he had it out for me, will all reason to. We never should have left Bella, she didn't deserve it.

'Bella' said Charlie walking up to her. He discussed the situation and she nodded, hopefully agreeing to the condition. She looked over at me every now and then and I smiled at her. Charlie took her in an awkward hug and then walked out the hospital. She stood there for a second looking around awkwardly. She looked so fragile and out of place. She had lost almost 19 pounds and her eyes were starting to lose their gorgeous brown.

'Bella' I said walking up to her and smiling.

'H-hi' she stuttered turning red.

'I must apologize for this situation' I said as I walked out the hospital 'but you must understand we only moved because of Edward. He thought it would be safer for you.'

'Obviously not' she mumbled.

'Bella' I said 'if this situation is making you uncomfortable I'm sure I could get someone else to stay with you.' I offered and she frowned.

'I-I should be fine' she managed.

'Let's go then' I said walking over to my newest car.

'Isn't this Ed-d- his car?' she asked looking at my newest car. I smiled lightly and opened the passenger door for her.

'Edward had a Vanquish' I replied stepping into my side of the car 'this is a Vantage.'

'Where's your Mercedes' she asked as curiosity got the better of her.

'With Esme' I replied waiting for her next question.

She looked up at me and frowned, 'what happened. I thought you loved her?'

'You know what love is like' I replied as I pulled up to her house, she nodded for me to go on 'I was willing myself in love, I needed someone and she was there.'

'What if I wasn't really in love then? She asked quietly, more to herself I believe.

'Bella' I said catching her attention 'if you weren't in love would we be here right now?' I asked her.

'Can I ring Alice?' she asked quietly.

'I'll do you a deal' I said 'you gain four pounds in the next week and you can.' She giggled slightly and stepped out the car. I didn't have to be Alice to guess she would slip. I ran around and caught her swiftly but she looked dazed, dazzled almost. I let her go hoping she didn't get to cold. Her cheeks turned a gorgeous red as she caught me staring at me.

'Thanks' she muttered before walking quickly back inside.

**So I believe I have not given you all translation for the title of the story. So in that case, the translation is **_**found another love.**_** I believe it suits perfectly. As Bella has found another love in Carlisle. I want you all to bear with me but there love will not come to them quickly because I want to start off focusing on their friendship as I blossoms forming into their love. How they find companions in each other and also how Charlie finds a liking in Carlisle.**

**Well enjoy that, reviews are lovely but of course only if you feel like it. If you have any further questions to hesitate to ask and I will write up your answer either in the next chapter or via a message.**

**Au Revoir Ashleigh.**


	6. Chapter 3

When Carlisle first stepped into the room I was shocked, thrilled but I felt queasy. And then it dawned on me. The crash. I had hit a silver Volvo. What if it was his?

Carlisle soon reassured me and I could help but feel happy with Carlisle back.

I must admit when he told me I couldn't have any more medicine that ache in my chest felt ten timed worse. Like it wasn't me that relied on the medicine but the ache. Of course I knew better. Of course I just wanted to sit there and ask Carlisle everything he knew about. Well about him. But Carlisle had told me I needed to go upstairs and rest in my own bed.

I wasn't sure how I felt about Carlisle 'babysitting' me. But I couldn't fight against the idea. Because just the thought of a vampire in the house made me feel - almost - better.

I woke up the next morning and instinctively reached for my pills.

'Crap' I cursed as I fell off the bed into a heap on the floor. Carlisle was in my room within seconds. He stood in the door watching me and he looked perfect.

'Are you okay?' he asked a small smile playing around on his lips.

'Fine' I hissed standing up shakily.

'Why don't we get you breakfast?' he asked.

'Elk or Mountain Lion?' I muttered sarcastically.

'Bella please' he said, his smile fading.

'Please what' I screamed at him 'say sorry for lashing out at you. The man who let his son break my heart in the middle of the woods. Say sorry for lashing out at when you moved your whole family - my boyfriend and best friend - spare of the moment. I found out when the La Push kids found me and started talking about 'the Cullen's' moving to LA.'

'He said he didn't love?' asked Carlisle with a growl. I nodded quietly as I realized tears were streaming down my face.

'You have to understand Bella, none of hurt you intentionally. We didn't want you to end up like this, we didn't want your heart to be broken' he sighed 'what Edward did was inexcusable and I have to apologize on behalf of my family for what he has put you through.'

I started to feel woozy and when I tried to smile Carlisle saw right through it.

'Bella lie down and I'll get you some breakfast.'

'I'm not hungry' I said crossing my arms over my chest and sitting on the bed. I was stubborn and I was not letting in to this vampire, no matter how gorgeous his eyes were. How coaxing his voice was.

_Snap out of it Bella_ I practically screamed at myself.

'Well if you don't eat you don't gain weight' he said 'and if you don't gain weight you won't be able to call Alice.'

He had me there.

'Just something small please' I murmured in a small voice.

'Of course Bella' he said before walking out my room and closing the door. I sighed and walked over to my closet pulling on a pair of track suit pants and long sleeve tee shirt. Noticing how the clothes barely fitted me anymore. I heard to phone ring downstairs and Carlisle picked it up. As I was momentarily distracted I wasn't watching where I was walking a tripped on the loose floor board. I shifted around on the floor and I was able to see what was in there. I gasped and I could feel tears slipping down my cheeks as I saw what it was. My music, my pictures, my tickets to Jacksonville. Everything he ever gave me. I picked up the picture of me and him and fingered it lightly as my body became wrecked with sobs.

'Bella' said Carlisle as he walked into the room.

'Oh no' he murmured, looking at the mess around me.

'I'm sorry' I whispered looking up at him.

'Bella don't be silly this is hardly your fault' he said sitting down next to me.

'When's Ch-Dad?' coming back I asked.

'He had to work a couple more days Bella' he said picking up the picture I was holding in my hand.

'How about we call Alice?' he asked as his mobile rang.

'Hello Alice' he answered and I giggled through my tears.

'Here she is' said Carlisle handing me the phone.

'Oh Bella' she gushed 'I'm so sorry for leaving you and I tried not to see visions of you really. Oh if only I had seen this. I love you really. It was stupid Edward' she growled at this 'but I swear Bella I'll be there as soon as I can. I'm booking flights now, well Jasper is. And I had the most amazing vision you're never going to believe it…'

'That's quite enough Alice' said Carlisle. He started talking too fast for me to catch on and then suddenly Alice was talking in my ear.

'What a party pooper her is' I assumed she was referring to Carlisle, I giggled and he smiled.

'Well don't you worry Bella because Jasper is currently looking up flight out of this horrid place. So far he has on for in three weeks. That's on long, but the private jet isn't working. And Carlisle won't let us use it. But I'll be there soon, and in the mean time you need to get better for me, gain some pounds. I would prefer it if you got over a hundred, but I guess the closer the better' she ended this with a satisfied sigh.

'I miss you Alice' I whispered.

'I know you do honey' she said back 'but I promise I'll be there as soon as I can, with Jazz and Esme.'

'Okay' I whispered back.

'Goodbye' she said in her chirpy voice before hanging up.

'Will you be alright if I go out for half an hour' he asked me. I nodded and looked down.

What's wrong' he asked.

'I don't want to leave' I admitted and he smiled.

'I'll go when Charlie comes back from work then' he said grabbing him from my out stretched hand.

'Bella tell me what you like doing' he said after a couple moments of silence.

'I like to read' I said looking down and then back up to the stack of books on my desk. I hadn't had the chance to read.

'Have you read all of them?' he asked looking at where I was looking.

'No' I replied 'I haven't had the chance.'

'Well what book is your favorite?' he asked.

'Wuthering heights' I replied and he smiled widely.

'You're in luck, I just so happen to know that book off my heart' I looked up at him and smiled brightly.

'I'm up to the part where Heathcliff is coming with Joseph' I explained. He smiled and started of reciting the book. As his velvet voice held me into a trance he lifted me into my bed and I was soon asleep.

The next three weeks had gone, well. I looked up to Carlisle in more way then I thought possible. Even Charlie had become Carlisle's friend. Much to my amusement they even went fishing together. Carlisle read to me every night. He finished Wuthering heights and started on Little Woman. I had never read it and he thought I'd enjoy it. Which I did immensely so.

Angela didn't need to come over anymore to help me shower, which relieved us both. But she still came over anyway. Carlisle now tutored me and Angela was the friend I needed. Carlisle had come home one night with a box. He called it my Edward box. He told me to put everything Edward related, including the blue blouse he loved on me. And to store it in the box. Much to my surprise I felt better about this. I felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders.

The worst thing had been staying off the drugs. After a week or so I couldn't eat anything because I would vomit it up. So instead of gaining weight like I had promised I now weighed 94.6 pounds and Carlisle was not happy. So every day at lunch he would come with McDonalds or Fish and Chips. Anything greasy and fattening. But of course I would just vomit it up. I saw the pity in both Charlie and Angela eyes. But there was something more in Carlisle's. It was like he thought it was his fault, which it wasn't of course.

'Bella' said Carlisle pulling me out of my thoughts.

'Oh sorry' I said looking up at him, I smiled when I saw him laughing.

'A penny for your thoughts?' he asked. I shook my head and he sighed.

'Well you can at least eat' he murmured using his hand to point to the food on his tray.

'I'm not hungry' I replied looking at the McDonalds.

'Nonsense' he said picking up some fries. He made the sound of an airplane as he brang them in a flying motion towards my mouth. I giggled and I was giggled he slipped them into my mouth. He looked relieved as I chewed on them and he did it again for a few more mouth full's until I ate them myself.

'We should get going' said Carlisle smiling and nodding towards the terminal.

'I guess' I said looking down at my clothes. I was wearing a blue blouse that Carlisle had gotten me because most of my clothes no longer fitted me. My jeans were baggy and I was wearing mary janes underneath them. Hopefully Alice would approve.

'Bella you look perfect' he said smiling.

_J/POV_

_(J/POV=Jasper POV. JB/POV=Jacob POV)_

We walked out of the terminal I was hit with waves of excitement from Alice and Esme. Alice held onto to my hand tightly as she skipped to find Bella. She suddenly stopped and looked up and me back to the spot she was looking at when she had stopped. Carlisle was standing there looking at Bella. She was clinging onto his side. Her face pale with a slight red tinge from her constant blushing. Her weight loose was evident, she had to be under a hundred pounds. Pain was flying off her, so much I almost wanted grimace. She looked up at Carlisle, wanting approval of sorts. When he nodded she smiled timidly before Carlisle stepped in front of her. Relief washed through her as he started walking forward.

'My visions are always right' she Alice smiling widely.

_B/POV_

We walked forward, and I hid behind Carlisle's back. I don't know why but he gave me that certain protection that I needed. I felt safe and comfortable behind him, rather than stepping forth and being out in the open.

'Esme' said Carlisle smiling widely. I felt jealous when I saw them hug like that. And even more jealous when I saw that Esme still wore her wedding ring. Jasper looked at me with a raised eyebrow and I turned red looking down to the ground. I had no right to be jealous really.

'Oh Bella' said Esme walking up to me and placing her hands on my shoulders.

'I'm so sorry about this really' she said pulling me into a hug.

'It's okay' I said timidly.

'It's really not' said Esme, 'why else do you think we sent him to boarding school. Serves him right to.'

Jasper growled at this and I smiled at him. He smiled back.

'Where's Alice?' I asked looking around.

'I'm here' she said popping up from behind Jasper. She smiled as I smiled and grabbed me into a huge hug.

'We have so much to catch up Bella' she started 'and your promised you'd gain weight what happened with that? We'll work on that, alright?' I nodded and she laughed. I really did miss her.

'We should go shopping soon too, nice blouse by the way' she piped in looking at Carlisle. I laughed again but also looked at Carlisle.

'Charlie's going to be home early tonight' I said to him 'and we haven't made dinner.'

'Alright let's get you home' he said putting his hand on the small of my back. On the drive home I sat in the passenger seat next to Carlisle. They were all eagerly talking, well catching up with one another and I just sat back and listened unless I was asked a question. When we finally got home Charlie wasn't home. Everyone came into the house and sat at the dining table while me and Carlisle cooked dinner for Charlie and myself. When Charlie did come home and looked like he was about to pass out when he saw all of us, including the newly arrived Angela. Of course he took a few minutes to start questioning them all, which thankfully was the time Carlisle had decided to take me to my room.

'How are you feeling?' he asked as I picked out the pajama's I was going to wear.

'I feel overwhelmed' I admitted biting my lip.

'And why would that be?' he asked.

'Well Charlie took a liking to the, Angela fits in perfectly. I feel kind of happy. But then I feel bad because I shouldn't be happy. Because he's not here. And that's not right.'

'Bella you are allowed to feel happy' he said putting a stray lock of hair behind my ear.

'I know but it doesn't feel right when I am' I replied 'there's something missing and I just don't like it.' By the end of this I was screaming. I had stood up.

'It's not fair, what the hell did I ever do to him' I kicked the wardrobe with so much force it feel to the ground and I feel backwards against the way. I started crying and I huddled against the wall.

_C/POV_

As soon as I saw her break down I instantly felt relief, this was good. She was admitting to her feelings. But I felt terrible. Terrible that she felt so horrible for feeling happy. That wasn't right and all we had was Edward to blame. It was horrible seeing her like this. Knowing that she is so unhappy, because she felt happy for just a small moment.

**SORRY SORRY SORRY, this is like semi unfinished. But I'm going away and felt terrible leaving you all without a chapter. SO IT'S CHRISTMAS AND I BELIEVE THERE'S SOME TWILIGHT THINGS UNDERNEATH THE TREE, WOOP WOOP (:**

**happy holidays everyone. my next chapter will be up in 2010. and very early in 2010 at that. i will be away for seven days, back for seven and then away for seven. i'll try and get an update when I come back but i may not be able to :(**

**MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, **

**Au Revoir Ashleigh. xx.**


	7. Chapter 4

Over the next week after Bella's breakdown everyone had their certain roles in her life. Mine and Charlie's having the biggest impact by far. Charlie was more of a fatherly figure than I think he had always been. He came home at almost the same time every night and she would always have dinner ready. She got into baseball and they watched it together most nights. Due to the fact she regularly woke so early now she always had a hearty breakfast ready for herself.

I became more of a friend than anything else. I helped her during the day. When she ate and through the vomiting which become an almost rare occurrence. I read to her every night and we soon had conversations. The thing about Bella, was that she was very mature for her age. Our conversations were usually set around books like the night we had finished Wuthering heights.

_'We're finished' I said looking right at her. She frowned._

_'I love that book' she whispered, smiling shyly. I wasn't sure why she was so shy and hesitant around me._

_'I met Emily Brontë once' I admitted and she gasped._

_'What was she like?' she asked sitting up._

_'She was lovely' I said trying to forget under which awful circumstances we had met._

_'Why'd you meet her?' Bella asked 'she must be awfully nice to chat to?'_

_'She was opinionated, always making sure her say was put out. But she was always compared to her sister Charlotte. It made her terribly sad' I said as she hung onto everyone of my words 'I didn't meet her in such nice circumstances. At a hospital actually. She travelled to America for a year and winded up in the hospital. I was only a nurse then, I still wasn't to use to blood as well as I am now.'_

_'Do you think vampire's have souls?' she asked suddenly._

_'Well Bella that is a highly debated topic. And I think we do to a point. But as you know, we are designed to kill a race we once belonged to.'_

_'Have you ever killed anyone?' she interjected._

_'No Bella I have not' I replied and she smiled._

_'The why would you be damned to hell?' she asked and I chuckled._

_'Why don't we answer that when it comes' I replied and she nodded fervently. _

_'Do you think I'll ever love someone again?' she asked, she was crying._

_Suddenly what Alice had told me sprung to mind. Apparently her visions of this outcome where getting visibly stronger._

_'Bella anything is possible' I whispered. She smiled slightly before leaning back on the bed and falling to sleep._

That was the first night our friendship started to come out. It crept up slowly, just the small things making us come together even more. The things I noticed about her; how she bit her lip, or the way her hair had a red tint to it when it was rarely in the sun. She stuttered when she was nervous and pouted when she was upset. She had Charlie wrapped around her finger, but she didn't notice. She would frown when she was caught up with something. She smiled widely as she cooked and she talked - a lot - when she was asleep.

She had said Edward's name a few times, a boy called Jacobs name and to my shock my name had been said a few times. I often stayed until she had been asleep for at least an hour, that's when her sleep would deepen and she would no longer have nightmares.

Charlie thanked me constantly, I had even gone fishing with him. I only caught one fish; they were repulsed by my cold hands and skin. Things like that had often happened, I had gotten Esme an Isle called 'Isle Esme.' we had gone there multiple times and once we had tried swimming with the dolphins. It had been an awfully good plan until they were scared away by the temperature of our skin.

Bella had be amused by the fact that I had gone fishing with her father.

'Carlisle?' Bella called as I walked into her house.

'It's just me?' I called to reassure her. She sighed in relief and I heard her stumble down the stairs. I ran as fast a I un-humanly could and caught her before she fell face first. I looked down at her and smiled, she was looking awfully confused.

'Th-th-thank you' she said shakily looking down.

'There's no need to be embarrassed Bella' I said as I took in her now crimson cheeks.

'Easy for you to say' she whispered under her breath. I chuckled and sat her back on her feet. I kept my hand on her back and guided her down the stairs.

'Being a vampire does have it's ups' I agreed.

'Except for the blood' she said solemnly afterwards.

'But-' she then added in thoughtfully 'I've always wanted to try vegetarianism.'

I chuckled once I had heard this but frowned when I saw her seriousness.

'I want to be a vampire' she said firmly, with no room for negotiation.

'Bella please' I said, her faced filled with sadness and she frowned.

'You don't want me, you don't want me as a vampire because I'm not with him anymore' her voice became accusing and I waited for her to become silent.

'Alice still see's you becoming a vampire' I replied, if it's really what she wanted I could give it to her. At first she looked shocked but then she smiled.

'When?' she asked.

'Before you turn nineteen' I replied and her smile didn't fade.

'Tell me why you want to be a vampire?' I asked her.

'Because I hate being so clumsy, I don't want to blush anymore and I want to be beautiful' she said.

'Bella you are a very beautiful young lady' I said honestly, she blushed and looked down at the table top.

'Bella I promise that one day you'll be one of us' she looked and smiled widely.

'I got Ed-d-him to eat pizza once' she admitted sheepishly. I chuckled and then sighed.

'Promise you'll never make me eat your food' I teased and she giggled.

'I promise' she said with a wink. I was shocked that she did wink but I hid this with a laugh. She smiled widely and then stood up.

'What are we doing today?' she asked and I smiled to myself. I had been waiting for this day. Bella was finally looking up.

'What about this one?' she asked holding up a movie called Nightmare on Elm street.

'Don't girls usually like romance?' asked Charlie. Bella shot him a look and put the movie in.

'Romance isn't exactly on the top of my list' she replied bitterly and Charlie nodded his head.

'Sorry Bells' he said and she frowned.

'Is Nightmare on Elm Street any good?' asked Jasper. He was a good bloke and you could tell it was in his best interest to change the mood. I felt sorry that he was given such a talent. It seemed like a most times it was more of a burden then gift.

'Well it's not a Romance' she said icily and Charlie stiffened.

'Bella' I said in a warning tone. She pouted and looked over at me.

'Why don't we go get some popcorn.' I offered but I didn't make it a question, because she would find a way out.

She followed me silently into the kitchen. When I turned to look at her she was standing at the door. She was holding herself around her stomach and waist. She looked tired and wary.

'What's wrong Bella, really?' I asked her.

'I'm happy' she said letting out a breath 'really but now that everyone's here I'm missing him. It doesn't feel right, I still don't feel right. Angela's got Ben, Alice has Jasper, Charlie has Sue and well you and Esme are still good friends, I think.'

'Bella, Bella, Bella,' I chanted causing her to smile ever so slightly. I sat her down at the table and she looked almost worried.

'Firstly, I thought Sue was with Harry Clearwater.'

She sighed and took a shaky breath.

'Harry died around a month ago and Sue and Charlie have found... Ah... Comfort in one another.'

'I see' I replied smiling 'and me and Esme, yes we're friends but Bella even I still feel alone.'

'I don't see why you feel alone' she huffed and I laughed, again.

'Bella' I said and she shot me a look 'you really don't understand. Yes I'm a vampire, but that doesn't mean I'm automatically happy. That everything is automatically perfect. I may have the speed, the talents, somehow the looks but Bella. Dead or not dead I still have a heart. I still have feelings and sometimes those feelings aren't happy. I thought everything was great with Esme.'

It wasn't but it doesn't mean I regret it. But I know now my love for her wasn't complete. I need you to understand Bella. I need you to realize that if I made you one of us right now, you wouldn't automatically be happy.'

We all need one and it's just such a shame that the person you had left you behind. You're truly wonderful Bella.'

_B/POV_

He called me truly wonderful. I sat there utterly dumbstruck, complete with my mouth catching flies while he called me wonderful. Then he admitted that he and Esme were never completely in love and that he was also lonely.

'I know' I replied and he looked at me, waiting for me to continue. 'But Carlisle when I'm a vampire I'll be beautiful forever a teenager. People will want me, that is all I've ever wanted. And I can't help to wonder how I'm going to find love again, if I can.'

'Bella for such a smart young lady you really don't have a very good view on yourself. Don't you realize you are beautiful? Edward told me what all the boys at Forks high think about you. You may not be a super model but you're not harsh on the eye. And you're certainly not dumb.'

'I see myself perfectly fine' I said knowing that I was being completely stubborn, it was in my nature.

'Bella let's look at this from a professional level' he said pulling his chair right in front of me.

'I'm a doctor' he started 'I have been in the profession for almost two centuries. I've seen some pretty nasty things. But the worst thing I have seen by far, is death.' I nodded for him to continue.

'I have seen people die from cancer, die from smoking, die from burns, die from flu's but the worst and hardest thing for me is when someone dies from having their heart broken.'

They stop eating, stop socializing, stop going to school or work and eventually – if medical attention isn't used – they die.'

And Bella I don't think I could live if that were to happen to you. Because you are already a big part of mine, Alice's, Jasper's, Esme's and still Edward's life. The thing is, I don't see you as a family member. I see you as a friend. And I couldn't imagine loosing you Bella.'

I sat there looking at him for a few seconds, 'I didn't realize you were alone.'

As soon as this left my mouth I realized how terrible it sounded. He chuckled lightly and took my hand.

'Why don't we get you to bed.' I nodded showing that I agreed and followed him up the stairs, past the TV room and into my room.

'What are we going to do when I'm a vampire?' I asked him, he looked confused.

'Well it's going to sound weird saying, _Bella come help me make popcorn_, when I can't eat it.'

'Bella' he said 'come help me look for classic books on the Ebay' he said with a wink. I laughed and he moved to the door frame.

'Goodnight Bella' he said smiling widely.

'Night Carlisle' I replied.

I woke up the next morning and Carlisle was sitting on the rocking chair in my bedroom.

'What are you doing here?' I asked as I pulled my blanket up higher.

'Alice was unable to make it today' he said as he smiled tightly.

'Why not?' I asked and he frowned.

'Complications' I thought I heard him say.

'What complications?' I asked looking at him, he sighed and smiled. Right as he smiled his phone rang.

'Rosalie?' he answerd, 'today?' he sound very worried, which was unusual.

'What's wrong?' I asked, possibilities running through my head.

'Are you leaving again?' I asked, the worry was evident in my voice.

'No Bella' he said.

'Promise?' I asked and laughed.

'Promise' he replied with a wink making me blush.

'Now I have to quickly stop by the hospital do you mind if we take seperate cars?' he asked and I nodded.

'Meet me in front of the Port Angeles boutique at ten' he instructed as we reached the front door.

'See you soon Bella' he said smiling widely. This smile reached his eyes, unlike that first few.

'Bye' I said before closing the door. I took a deep breath and looked around the house for my car keys. I found them placed on the table with a note.

_Stay safe, please._ It read. I smiled and picked up my keys. I ran upstairs and changed into my jeans and blue blouse. But of course when I looked at the clock it was nine thirty.

I drove as fast as my truck could get me, but of course Carlisle was there waiting for me.

'I'm glad you could make it' he said laughing 'i'm sure your truck wasn't much help.

'That truck could be your cars grandfather, don't be mean' I replied and of course to show my maturity I stuck my tongue out a him. Much to my surprise he stuck his tongue out also which made me giggle.

'Now I have stricked instructions from Alice' he said holding the boutique door open 'which includes a dress for _future _events, a pair of higher then two inch heels, a tailored jacket, a pair of _new _black converse, dark blue jeans and lot's of blue tops.'

'I don't have enough money for that' I replied hoping it would get me out of half of them clothes.

'Bella I can pay for it' he said as he walked towards the jeans.

'I couldn't ask that of you Carlisle' I replied holding up a blue blouse. It was almost like the one I was wearing except for the tiny lace buttons and blue ribbon at the back.

'That looks nice' said Carlisle nodding to the blouse.

'Thanks' I replied 'it is awfully expensive.'

'Bella after living for three centuries I have plenth of money, more then enough to buy you a small list of clothes.'

'I guess maybe a few things' I said after a moment of thought. I hated people buying things for me, but Carlisle I wasn't sure why but I felt better about him buying me all these things.

'Well what size jeans are you?' he asked me.

'I'm not entirly sure' I replied bitting my lip out of habit.

'Did you want to get fitted?' he asked me, motioning to the fitting room.

'Sure'I replied, he smiled and took me over to the lady.

'Your a size what?' exclaimed Carlisle.

'4' I replied in an almost aduible whispered.

'Bella' he said 'this isn't good.'

'Obviously' I replied bluntly, I was starting to get angry now.

'Can we please get that pair' he said pointing to a pair of dark blue, skinny cut jeans. The sales lady passed them to him and he placed with the blouse.

We continued shopping almost silently, nodding and expressing what we thought about certain clothes every now and then. We had gotten everything on Alice's list and we ended up at the food court.

'Did you know when I was a human my favourite food was crisps' he replied amd I laughed.

'I like chocolate sundays' I admited looking down.

'Would you like one?' he asked waving to McDonalds.

'I haven't eaten lunch yet' I replied and he laughed.

'I hardley think think it's going to hurt you' he replied.

'Whatever you say doc' I replied and he laughed.

'Two chocolates sunday's' he said when we walked up there, I was about to interupt but he put his finger up to stop me. He grabbed the sundays and picked a table away from everyone for us to sit.

'My favourite colour was green' he said smiling, he smile was infectious. Of course making me smile.

'What is it now?' I asked picking up my spoon. I took a bite and he smiled.

'Theres this colour in between blue and green. Only vampire's can see it, its a beautiful colour.'

'When will I become a vampire?' I asked after a few minutes of silence. Carlisle pushed over hin sunday.

'Alice see's it within the next six months.'

'Six months?' I re-checked with a smile.

'Although things change' he reminded me and I giggled.

'Tell me some more about youself' I asked.

**(A/N we never heard much about Carlisle so sorry if some of this may not have been what you liked :)**

'Well Bella' he started 'as you know I'm a doctor. I've been around blood long enough that the scent has been blocked out almost completley. But it does come handing when fixing people.'I nodded for him to continue.

'I own an island in the Caribean and also bought Esme and island called Isle Esme.'

'Own an island?' I asked. He laughed at my incredulous expression.

'Yes Bella' he replied 'I also own the Forks hospital. Bit nobody knows that.'

'Wow' I replied. He chuckled and then sighed. Suddenly his phone rang.

'Charlie' he answered, he started talking to Charlie and then hung up.

'There's some things we need to talk about' said Carlisle seriously.

'Has Charlie told you to tell me this?' I asked.

'I told him and he advised me upon telling you when you were ready.'

'And I'm ready now?' I asked and he smiled slightly.

'I haven't seen you anymore ready' he replied.

'Continue' I replied.

'It's about Edward' he said an I took in a deep breath.

'Do you remember how we talked briefly about the coven Edward went to when he first met you?'

'Tanya's coven' I said with an icy nod.

'Well in that coven there is as you said Tanya, her sister Irina who has taken a liking to Laurent. But then there's kate' he said trailing off.

'What about her?' I asked confused.

'Edward went for hunt around Forks, they took him about twenty minutes. The run to the coven in Alaska took another forty.'

'Bella' he said slowy 'Kate and Edward were sexually involved while you were with Edward.'

'No' I whispered shaking my head. This wasn't true. He wouldn't have done this to me.

'Bella I'm so sorry' said Carlisle as my tears started to drench my cheeks.

'I'm fine' I said using a napkin to wipe my tears.

'We need to get a pair of heels, right?' I asked standing up.

'There's a shop near the boutique' he replied standing up beside me.

'Bella are okay-' I cut him off. I couldn't talk about it right now.

'Let's just get the heels' I said walking towards the boutique. We walked into the shoes store and I pointed to a small pair of black heels.

'I think you ll find they're to short' he replied with a laugh.

'They're Jimmy Choo's' I said 'she can't complain.'

'Okay then' he replied smiling. We finished buying everything and we walked out to the carpark.

'Where's my truck?' I asked looking around the carpark.

'Alice has taken it back to your house, she saw an infortunate accident if you were to drove.'

'Right' I replied walking over to his car. I got in and he sighed as he got in after me.

'Bella honestly' he said 'are you okay?'

'Is he with her now' I asked after about five minutes of silence, tears were streaming down my cheeks.

'He's in a boardin school in Africa' he replied grimacing.

'Carlisle just tell me where he is, im not that stupid' I screamed.

'He's with Kate in England on their honeymoon.'

'He's married?' I whispered.

'Yes' he replied shaking his heat. He was holding onto the stearing wheel tightly.

'I can't believe I was such an idiot. And him, I can't belive I wanted to become a vampire for that.'

'Bella calm down' he said.

'Of course he didn't want me' I said as I realised I was shouting and crying. I honestly didn't care.

'I don't know why he even stayed with me, he probably just hoped he could have my blood. I was probably just a game, testing his limits.'

**(A/N okay guys this is hard writting bad things about Edward, because I love him. So sorry if I skim slightly over this. But I'm going to make it good. And we still have Victoria so this story will keep going, promise :)**

'Bella I need you to calm down' he said and I noticed the car had stopped.

'This isn't fair' I shouted at him. He frowned'I know Bella' he replied grimacing 'I know it's not fair. What Edward did was moronic and I can't believe none of us saw it earlier.'

'Why are you being so nice?' I asked him.

'Bella why wouldn't I be?' he asked 'what Edward did is one of the worst things and to you makes even more unfahomable.'

'I'm sorry' I whispered as my body started to shake.

'Oh Bella don't be silly, you should not be the one apologizing.' I tried to smile at him but I just shock harder. Before I could realise what was happening Carlisle was opening my door and picking me up. He then moved us around so I was sitting on his lap.

'I need you to calm down' he whispered into my ear. I didn't realise but I was now sobbing hysterically. Carlisle was holding me tightly as he closed the car door. He had one arm tucking me into him and the other around my neck. I was griping tightly onto his shirt.

'I want you to breath clearly' he instructed 'in and out.' He said that to keep my breathing in time. He then stopped and looked to the drivers door. Jasper sat in and started the car.

'Charlie's house please' asked Carlisle and Jasper nodded as he started to drove.

'Bella why to feel sorry?' asked Jasper.

'That I split your family' I replied as I tucked my head under Carlisle's shoulder.

'Don't be daft Bella' said Carlisle laughing 'we couldn't imagine our family without you.'

'I thought you said you didn't think of me as family' I replied.

'No' he said 'you are apart of our family but I don't see you as a daughter like I do of Rose or Alice. I see you as a friend, a very good friend.'

'And Bella' said Jasper 'I am terribly sorry for snapping at you, it was inexcusable but you must understand you are like a sister to me.'

'Thanks' I whispered.

'Where almost there' said Carlisle ten minutes later. My body had finally stopped shaking leaving me room to think. I was having trouble comprehending the fact that he had cheated on me. All them times he talked about his self control. And how it wasn't good for him to be kissing me. He probably just didn't want to kiss me at all. I was just the little fragile human toy. If I was a vampire...

'I want to be a vampire' I mumbled into Carlisle's shirt.

'Well talk about it later' said Carlisle holding me closer to his chest. I sighed contently and breathed in. I really didn't know what I'd do without Carlisle.

I had drifted off to sleep and when I woke up in a room I had never seen. The walls were creme and covered in huge oak bookshelves. The bed was a matching oak with a gold bedspread. I was lying on top of the bedspread.

Carlisle walked in and smiled.

'This is my room' he said walking over to a book shelf near me. He picked up a book that seemed as though it should be falling apart, it was in perfect condition.

'This is an original two owner copy or Wuthering heights' he said smiling.

'An original?' I said unintentionally in a questioning tone.

'Signed' he replied with a chuckle. He sat down on the end of the bed and passed the book to me.

'Bella I'm sorry to burden you with all of this but Victoria is coming back, with you as her target.'

'Oh' I replied dropping the book.

'What are you think about Bella?' he asked. It was so simple, if they made me into a vampire she couldn't kill me. Or at least do it easily. I could fight back.

'Make me a vampire' I said shoving my wrist out to him.

'Not quite yet' said Jasper. I huffed causing them both to laugh.

'This isn't far' I announced.

'Don't be silly' said Carlisle 'we promise it's going to happen before your nineteenth birthday.'

'And I only want you or Jasper to do it' I replied firmly and he nodded.

'Of course Bella' said Jasper smiling shyly.

'We should get you home now Bella' said Carlisle 'I can't imagine how today has taken its toll on you.'

'Yeah' I replied getting off the bed. I started to re-make the bed due to the fact that I had messed it up.

'Don't worry about that Bella' said Esme as she slowly walked in.

'Esme' said Carlisle and Jasper.

'Could we please have some privacy?' asked Esme.

'Of course' replied Carlisle. He smiled at me before leaving the room.

'Bella you know I see you as one of my own?' asked Esme sitting down next to me. I nodded and she smiled.

'Well I just want to say, firstly, how sorry I am for everything' she said as I sat down next to her 'but there are some other things we need to talk about involving some things Alice has seen.' I nodded again and smiled at her. She smiled back and I realized just how hostile towards her I had been. And it cut me up because I had not right because she had been nothing but nice towards me.

'Oh Esme I'm so sorry' I said and she smiled.

'Bella' she said 'it's highly understandable' she started 'what you and Carlisle have is amazing. I'm highly envious of it and I can understand how you felt towards me in the beginning.'

'What do you mean what me and Carlisle have?' I asked confused, sure Carlisle was the only person, really, that has been able to influence my life. I don't see him as a father. I see him as a very attractive best friend. Wait, no he's just a best friend. He was just a friend. Friend, friend, friend.

'Bella' said Esme looking quite worried. Oh god who was I kidding, I was falling for Carlisle.

_C/POV_

'How could you do this to me' screamed Alice, she was hysterical. And making Jasper flinch.

'Do what?' I asked honestly confused.

'Your letting her marry you in Las Vegas' screamed Alice 'Why?'

'Alice I hardly think you should get worked up about this when it isn't even in the near future' I said trying to calm her down.

She crossed her arms over her chest and stared at me. 'It's in the future' she said 'I even have a date.'

'It's that definite?' I asked warily.

'Yes' she said smiling widely 'Carlisle and Bella sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G' she sang skipping around.

'Alice' said Esme and we both turned around, Esme was standing there glaring at Alice while Bella stood next to her.

'Oh no' muttured Alice looking from me to Esme.

'Jasper would you take Bella home' I said, 'me and Esme need to speak to Alice.'

'More like torture' muttered Alice. I looked back over to Bella who was staring at me. I smiled at her and she smiled back faintly.

'Bella' called Jasper as he stood at the front door.

'I'll take her to the car' I said walking over to Bella. She followed me out to the car as I opened the passenger door. She sat down and then looked back at me.

'Do you think you could drive here tomorrow?' I asked her 'I have a meeting and the other's, besides Esme, are going to pick up Em and Rose. He's really excited to see you Bella.'

She looked down and took a few seconds before she looked back up and answered. 'Is twelve okay?' she asked.

'Perfect' I replied. she smiled slightly.

'Bella promise me you'll stay safe' I said, I didn't even know where it had come from.

'Promise' she whispered looking down. and then I did something totally unexpected, I kissed her on forehead.

'Goodbye Bella' I said and she snapped out of her daze.

'Bye?' she said making it sound like a question. I turned around and my gaze meet two other very questioning gazes, and one happy, very happy gaze. You had to love Alice.

**so there we go. it's longer then my usuals, bella is finding her love for carlisle and HE KISSED HER, kind of. screams*  
okay so it took a while and i apologize but remember im australian and for all you that arent i had christmas and new years, australia day is coming and so is school again, yuck. but i promise to keep going and make this go as good as i can :) **

**BUT ON A HIGHLY BETTER NOTE LET ME SHARE SOME FABULOUS NEWS. for christmas i received the Edward Cullen barbie. its amazing. i also got a book called Hush Hush. its doesnt hold my heart as much as Edward, Robert and Twilight do. but patch does receive some of my thoughts. i highly recommend it. **

**oh and im going away again, so there will either be a small chapter in the next four days, or a longer chapter in fifteen to eighteen days (:**

**Au Revoir Ashleigh. xx.**


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